Memory and forgetfulness… What’s normal?

Well – they say any hiatus is a good hiatus (…at least I hope they do), because after the world’s LONGEST hiatus we’re officially back! In the midst of moving states, two new jobs, getting engaged, travelling overseas, planning a wedding, and much, MUCH more, this poor old blog of mine got majorly relegated to the back seat of life’s priorities. So it’s time to jump back in, get writing again, and do my best to think up some interesting and relevant topics to unpack for you all.

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First off the blocks is…memory! That funny little cognitive ability that’s vital to function adequately and survive as human beings. A huge topic that, thanks to working in a memory clinic, has been very much front of mind for me recently. Whilst I most commonly work with older adults, memory complaints are not uncommon in the younger age-groups. These memory symptoms or ‘failures’ are becoming increasingly more prevalent in the current climate of chronic overstimulation, usually at the hands of technology, and/or just having too much on our proverbial plates.

I’d say you’d be hard-pressed to find an adult who hasn’t at some point complained about their memory, or perceived lack thereof. We all know someone who’s “terrible with names”, or "can’t even remember what I ate for breakfast”. Or maybe that’s you, and you’re the one consistently feeling as though your mind is a sieve.

Now it’s important to note that for the purpose of the current piece, I’m going to focus on the correct or healthy function of the memory system, rather then delve too deeply into what happens when it starts to break down. We know there are myriad reasons; including dementia, brain injury, or various other medical and developmental conditions that can impact on an individual’s memory function. Unfortunately, there are far too many to cover in today’s post! So please keep that in mind as you read on.

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What is memory? 

Memory is a cognitive function that involves the encoding, storage, and retrieval of information. For healthy individuals, all three of these components work together to promote optimal function. Let’s take remembering someone’s name as an example of how this works (which, by the way, is actually one of the more difficult tasks our memory system faces, due to the random nature of attaching a name to a face, with little to no support from our other stores of knowledge). There’s unfortunately nothing about a person that prompts you, or suggests to you what their name might be – it’s entirely arbitrary, and relies purely on our ability to remember previously learnt information.

When you’re introduced to someone and given their name, this information enters our short-term memory. Unfortunately, if you’re like me, and spend too much time concentrating on not stuffing up the handshake, or get distracted by trying to be a normal, non-socially-awkward individual, short-term memory is the beginning and end for that little piece of information, and then it’s gone soon after.

But, in other less awkward situations, that name might get rehearsed a little bit while it’s sitting in our short-term memory, which helps encode it, and transfer it to our long-term memory for storage. A week or two later, when you see this person again, their name has (hopefully) been encoded well enough, that you’re able to retrieve it easily from your long-term stores in time to say hello.

Forgetting (it’s normal!)

Funnily enough – another vital function of a healthy memory system is actually the ability to forget. Seems strange right? But think of the consequences of a memory system that was not designed to allow us to forget. Every tiny little insignificant piece of information that crossed your mind or your sensory organs from day to day would be stored, competing with more important things in the filing cabinet of your memory system. Who cares what your colleague ate for breakfast last week? Or how many times the smoke detector squealed when you burnt your toast this morning?

Whilst our long-term memory storage capacity is considered to be infinite, having some control over what information we commit to memory is definitely a good thing.

image via giphy.com

Memory 'failures'

The ability to forget unimportant information from day-to-day is beneficial, and something we don’t even consciously realise we’re doing. However, things can become concerning (and let’s face it – annoying) when we have difficulty remembering important things, like conversations with friends and family, appointments, meetings, etc etc.

This kind of day-to-day forgetfulness in otherwise healthy individuals (i.e., not those with an underlying illness, injury or developmental abnormality) may not actually be a failure of memory retrieval, nor is it necessarily indicative of something sinister.

Attention, or lack of it, is usually the culprit in this instance. Think about it – to be committed to memory, information must be attended to, focused on, and even rehearsed a little during the encoding phase. You can’t be expected to commit something to memory if you’re thinking about a million other things, and only giving fleeting amounts of attention to information before you’re off thinking about something else. You also then can’t expect to remember or retrieve something that was never encoded or stored in the first place. 

Information in your short-term memory is at its most vulnerable – to distraction, interruptions, and attentional failures. Your short-term memory is also a finite, limited store, so each new piece of information is fighting to stay front of mind, before it's replaced by something else. Ever walked into a room and forgotten why you were there? Say hello to a prime example of an attentional fail. It isn’t your memory letting you down in this instance, it’s because you may not have payed much attention to the thought in the first place, and a new piece of information has since taken its place. 

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What impacts attention and memory?

In this day and age, many of us live busy, high-stress lives, with a million things on our plates. Keeping on top of work, family, kids, friends, partners, exercise, travel, mental health; it’s difficult just to stay afloat. Throw technology and constant stimulation into the mix – you’ve got yourself a cocktail of stress and distraction that can wreak havoc on your memory. 

Ever tried to hold a conversation whilst reading something or texting on your phone? Good luck remembering what was said to you (and avoiding an argument about it later). And who else forgets to pack their lunch in the chaos of coordinating seventeen (or maybe seventy) other things before you leave the house in the morning? In both instances, our short-term memory is inundated, and various bits of information are competing heavily for just a little sliver of our undivided attention. 

Poor sleep, hunger, fatigue, stress (this one’s a big one), worry, anxiety, low mood, sadness, grief, frustration, pain, and alcohol can all significantly impact our attention and concentration, and therefore the ability to remember. 

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What can I do about it?

From a functional perspective, using a diary, calendar, setting reminders, or simply writing notes to yourself and placing them strategically around the house all work a treat. We all rely on memory aides – and as our lives get busier, our need for them increases.

Meditation is another way to help clear your mind and pave the way for the important stuff to be able to ‘stick’ in your memory. Frequent, simple mindfulness practices have been shown to improve memory function in healthy individuals, both young and old. I even decided to venture into the world of meditation last year, which you can read about here.

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Simple mindfulness strategies you can try:

• Take Ten Breaths - Pause and take ten slow, deep breaths, while bringing your focus to the sounds and sensations of your breath. Try to let other thoughts come and go, as though they are passing cars. You can then try expanding your awareness, by simultaneously noticing your breathing and sensations in your body. 

• Notice Five Things – Pause for a moment and look around, noticing five things you can see, hear, and feel in contact with your body (your watch against your wrist, your legs against your chair). Try noticing these sensations simultaneously. 

• Drop Anchor – Plant your feet into the floor, pushing them down, noticing the floor supporting you beneath your feet. Notice the muscle tension in your legs as you push down, then notice the feeling in your entire body, as gravity flows down through your head, spine, legs, and feet. 

Mindfulness meditation also has far-reaching benefits for psychological wellbeing, and has demonstrated efficacy in the treatment of depression and anxiety disorders. Importantly, the alleviation of depression and anxiety symptoms has also been shown to significantly improve memory function.

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Just remember...

The moral of the story here is that it’s ok to forget! For healthy individuals, forgetting is a normal bi-product of a healthy, well-functioning memory system. But, if you’re finding yourself increasingly frustrated by forgetfulness and difficulty remembering more important information – take pause and have a look at what else might be competing for your attention. 

Also, remember to be kind to yourself! Don’t beat yourself up, because there’s usually a simple explanation for why something slipped through the cracks, and more often than not, it’s nothing to be concerned about.




If you or someone close to you is experiencing memory symptoms that appear to be more serious, consult your doctor for further information.